Trip To Florida

In July 2008 I found myself in a very difficult place. I had just lost another sister Arlene to death and had already lost Katha and Linda in the spam of a year. At this time my own health was pretty bad and I not only was physically ill I was emotionaly ill. I was in a pretty bad place and the depression was about to consume me to a point of no return. I was having a very hard time griveing my losses and no one seemed to care how it was affecting me. I then decided that I would just leave Elk City where I was so unhappy at the time and move to Florida where my youngest son and Merle lives. I really didnt give this move very much thought and planning I just wanted to move out of Elk City and as soon as I could. Merle being the wonderful man he is saw to it financially that I could move. They found me a nice place and proceeded to move me.It was a really nice place that I moved to and I quickly found me a doctor (mainly because I had a heart attach during the move - but that is another story) smile This doctor took one look at my medical records and all the medication that I had been on for many years and he started cutting them out one by one and by the time I left that doctors office that day I went from takinig 15 pills a day to taking 5 pills. Boy was this a change for me because I was also on oxygen 24/7 and could barely walk across the floor. So on his insistance I started going to the pool each day and getting exercise that I had not had or able to do in many years. I lost 25 pounds in the matter of weeks and still losing. All the sudden I could breath again and no more daily asthma attacks and no swelling of my legs and just over all feeling much better. This was a good thing for sure. Also during this time I was able to really grieve the losses that I had and come to some understanding as the why I was left the only McConnell child in our family of 8 kids. During my stay in Florida I had lost my last sister Doris which left me alone to be the only one. After about four months into my stay in Florida I began to realize that I was pretty lonely and really thought I should move back to Oklahoma but not to Elk City. I briefly moved to Tulsa to stay with Candi, Josh and the baby but that did not work out. I was then left with yet another move which would be my third in 6 months and major moves at that. I made the decission to move back to Claremore, Oklahoma where I lived for many years prior to my disability and retirement. My dear friend Jayne and her husband Donald and son said they would move me. I had a hard time finding a place in such short notice but I decided that I would move to the Senior Citizen Housing which is not a Nursing Home but it kind of reminds me of one. I have a nice little apartment and I am able to live fine and comfortable in it. I also am able to go back to my church that I loved for so many years, St Andrews United Methodist. I have been able to see my old friends from work and that is really going to be nice. I thought when I was making this choice that someday I would more than likely end up in a Nursing Home since I have little family left and none that can really care for me if needed. This place will be fine and I will be as happy here as I will anywhere. I am still pretty much grieving the loss of my sisters and that may never end. So as I said in the beginning of this post the trip to Florida was not a loss it allowed me time to get my thoughts together to decide what I would do for the rest of the time God allows me to be on this earth. Dont know why I am still here but I do believe there is a reason.